A beautiful lie
by butterfly1415
Summary: Songfic. "If you can't beat the game, if you can't solve the puzzle, you're nothing but a loser. A beautiful lie". Rated T for alot of angst. Song by 30 seconds to Mars


Near

Songfic

A beautiful lie

**Warning: Alot of angst and almost suicidal thoughts**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note. Don't make me sad.**

**A/N: This is a songfic with 'A beautiful lie' by 30 seconds to Mars. I heard the song, and thought it would fit Near because of the 'empty face' in the lyrics. Oh, anyway..enjoy! And I would love a review *hint*. Here you go:**

_Lie awake in bed at night  
And think about your life  
Do you want to be different?_

Almost every night, he lie awake. He thought about the weirdest things. He really wanted to be different, to be someone else. To live a different life, a normal life. But that wasn't a possibility. One, he was an albino. Two, he had no parents. And three, he was way too smart. It was weird, he thought, that someone so smart just wanted to be normal. He never told anyone these thoughts.

_  
Try to let go of the truth  
The battles of your youth  
'Cause this is just a game_

He really didn't wanted to hear it. That he became number one again. It didn't mean anything to him. But he was too smart to fake his test results, to make them worse. And people would notice it. He couldn't take this pressure. These expectations. He was far too young for so much responsibility. He would gladly had Mello become number one, become L. He was too young for this title. This pressure of having to solve crimes, to save people. So he thought of it as a game. A game of lives. Then, he could handle the pressure.

_It's a beautiful lie  
It's the perfect denial  
Such a beautiful lie to believe in  
So beautiful, beautiful it makes me_

"L is dead". No. No, no, no, no. This couldn't happen. How? "If you can't beat the game, if you can't solve the puzzle, you're nothing but a loser". L was a loser. He had lost. L died. He tried to hide it. The sorrow, the grief, the pain. A beautiful lie. That everyone believed in. Now he had to take over from L, to win this game of lives - or rather- lies. He had to win, he couldn't lose like L had. He had loved L, and he lost. A beautiful lie. No, L had won. He got away from this world. This cruel, cruel world. Away, from the responsibility as L.

_It's time to forget about the past  
To wash away what happened last  
Hide behind an empty face  
Don't ask too much, just say  
'Cause this is just a game_

He tried to forget his past. Erase the memories. But, as he had discovered a long time ago, memories don't go away. He hid himself. Behind this empty face, this blank expression. He couldn't let people see his feelings. He barely spoke either. It was better to have people ignore him, to forget him. This was, afterall, a game. A game of lies. And if he failed, if he lost, he didn't wanted anyone to remember him. Forget. Forget, if only he could.

_It's a beautiful lie  
It's the perfect denial  
Such a beautiful lie to believe in  
So beautiful, beautiful it makes me_

_(Oh Oh  
The end of the world)_

It felt like the end of the world. He was alone.

_Everyone's looking at me  
I'm running around in circles, baby  
A quiet desperation's building higher  
I've got to remember this is just a game_

He had to focus. To concentrate. He had to win. Not for himself, he didn't care, but for L, who had won. Or lost. He was getting desperate. He HAD to win. This was just a game. A battle between good and evil. Or rather evil and commitments. He had to do this. He was born to do this.

(_So beautiful, beautiful  
It's a beautiful lie  
So beautiful, beautiful  
It's a beautiful lie  
So beautiful, beautiful...)_

_It's a beautiful lie  
It's the perfect denial  
Such a beautiful lie to believe in  
So beautiful, beautiful it makes me_

He'd won. A beautiful lie. They've all died. They had won. L, Matt, Mello and even Kira, Light Yagami. They got away. They died. He was alone. Now, he had to solve crimes, until he died. And, for a fact, he was alredy bored. Bored to death. If only boredom could kill, then at least he would be dead.

**A/N: Review please. I would love it if you would tell me what was good and what was bad. Thanks. And tell me if you'd like me to make more songfics. Later. **


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